Chronic Illness · Migraines
Late Bloomer. Found outside Civano Nursery, Tucson, AZ. (next door to my house)

It’s 7:34am and I’ve already been up for 2 hours, that wouldn’t be so bad if I’d gotten to sleep before 1am. Waking up at 5:30 with horrible head pain is not a good start to the day. And taking Migranal nasal spray is not the best thing to taste first thing either. But my head is better.

It’s monotonous and down right boring to have a migraine for well over a year now. Every day, pain. Every day, nausea. Every day, sensitivity to light, sound, and smells. Every day, another day, same shit. It only changes in intensity, but it’s always there. I’ve had a constant headache for 47 years, but it’s only been since April of 2020 that it’s been a migraine. The persistent headache I always have, is different, and thankfully not nearly as painful.

I do have hope though. I have a virtual appointment with Diamond Headache Clinic on the 9th. They will then determine if I need more tests here, or if I need to be admitted. Everyone is expecting admission. I just want them to be able to help.

I was thinking they might try ketamine, but with my blood pressure issues that’s not going to happen. I don’t know if I should be sad, or relieved. I’ll only be sad if I found out that’s the only thing that would help.

My blood pressure is still out of control. I had a 24 hour blood pressure monitoring test on Monday. I’ll hopefully find out the results later today. However, I saw some of the readings on it and it was often way high. The highest I saw was 201/101. That’s scary high! I probably should have gone to the ER, but I hate it there. And I was afraid the stress of going would make my BP rise even more.

I’m going to skip Spravato this week to see if maybe it comes down a bit, but I’m not hopeful. I feel like I’m either going to die from depression, or high BP. I really don’t want to die from either.

More good news about Diamond Headache Clinic, they just called and said since my out-of-pocket maximum has been met then this whole thing will cost us nothing! Woo Hoo! Since Stuart is allowed to say with me in the room, we don’t even need to have a hotel room. We’ll need to find out if there’s actually a bed in there, or if he has to sleep in a chair, if it’s a chair, I’d rather him have a hotel to get some rest in. We’ll see. We will need a room for a few days after I get out, I’m really hoping to see a couple of people while I’m out that way. That would make the whole trip even nicer.

I was starting to see some people in the neighborhood, but I’m not sure how much more that will happen with the rise in COVID starting again. Almost all seemed to feel that after being vaccinated they were “free”, hardly anyone wearing masks, even inside. I admit I felt the pressure of going without mine. It is so much nicer because I can now see people’s lips, but it’s not worth putting my, or others, health at stake. The variant D strain is worrisome. Children are supposed to be more likely to get it, and the little ones can’t be vaccinated. I’m really worried about them all going back to school and so many schools don’t have mask requirements. I feel so bad for them, and their parents. The vaccinated are only 80% protected from it. I’m in that little margin in so many other things, I don’t feel like I should risk it at all.

I saw my therapist yesterday and she had some scary news. She knows 3 people who have COVID right now, who are vaccinated. One is asymptomatic, the other two have slight symptoms. The two with symptoms went to the doctor when they started to feel bad and that’s the way they found out. The two with symptoms were at a gathering before so all had to be tested, the third person found out that way. Unfortunately, the morning before she found out she had breakfast with my therapist. So she had to get tested, and had the one that takes a few days to get back to make sure it was more accurate. She said it was a long 4 days.

I’m jumping all around here, but here’s something else, I don’t think I’ve talked about yet. My doctor is testing my adrenal function. Unfortunately, LabCorp is backed up due to COVID tests so I can’t get my test done until next week. Anyway, come to find out a tumor on your adrenals can cause sudden high blood pressure, increased anxiety, long lasting headaches, and weight changes. So we have to rule this out. Stuart and I are actually hoping I have a benign tumor they can just remove and make me a new woman! Ha! As if anything is that easy with me.

Well, Stuart just heard from the doctor’s office and my test results are there so I need to get clean and get dressed.

I’d love to hear from you all, shoot me a comment to let me know what you’re up to.

The photo above was taken by Stuart on one of his morning walks this week. It’s amazing! Saguaros don’t bloom this late. I guess it’s a late bloomer. Maybe I am too. Maybe it’s simply taken a long time to find ways to help me feel better, and I can start to bloom soon.

2 thoughts on “

  1. Sending you lots of hugs and positive energy. I hope your docs can find something to help. Migraines are the most awful thing ever. I can deal with a lot but migraines bring me to my knees. I can’t even imagine what you’ve been through, love!
    I hope the headache clinic can help. It might be worth getting a motel room for Stuart…..when I had my brain radiation we had a hotel room in town and it was nice to have a quiet place to be. When I had my hip surgery my husband stayed with me for most of the 3 days I was in and if I had to do it again I’d send him to a place he can rest. They’re always coming in and it’s not a quiet place when you’re admitted.

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  2. So, when are you heading to Chicago? I’m guessing that’s the wahoo in your post. When are your going? Good luck; I really do hope the clinic is able to find out what’s behind your migraines. With the route, and the adrenal possibilities, perhaps there might be a fix. The benign adrenal tumor possibility would certainly make for a nice, quick fix for most “of what ails you.” Either way, you are embarking on new healing routes. And, maybe getting a step closer to understanding and changing your chronic illness patterns. All the best. Let us know how it all turns out.

    Liked by 1 person

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